This poem is dedicated to Nan… a wise woman that helped me remember one of my life’s main lessons.
The Patina of Stature
I grew up on a farm of meager means; blissfully unaware of society’s themes.
Of power and money, of stature and score; I lived not knowing what lay in store.
I’m not aware of the place or the second it changed but suddenly other people had much more than I could obtain.
They had substance, stuff, knowledge and insight galore; I remember thinking it HAD to be better than what I had before!
So I coveted, prayed, whined and explored… all the ways that I could possibly open up their golden doors.
I focused so intently, I focused so well that one day I turned around and realized I was in hell.
It now had been almost half of my life; I had become a lover, a mother and a much doubting wife.
Of course I was still empty, of course I still couldn’t see… all I knew was that I HAD to find the REAL me.
So I sat and reflected and as I lay score; my visions started to turn to the little girl I was once before.
Suddenly my heart opened up, a haze began to clear, and I could feel my entire body smiling again from ear to ear!
I had bought into their story, their shiny lore; so much so that I sold my farm and bought their entire gilded store!
Only to find out when the chips did finally lay that my blissful ignorance was lost one innocent childhood day.
But now I know where I come from and where I’m going someday. A little girl stands before you proudly…but in a much more humbled way.
They almost had me, these social-concepts really did. I would of given them anything to outcast anybody’s bid.
Thank God I looked inside! Thank God I sought his wisdom!
To know the Patina of Stature was nothing but an empty prison!